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The Borovkoff Blog

Neo-Pagan Modern Thoughts On Society

Dear Other Woman/Man,

I didn’t know much about you. I only met you once when you came to my house to take my husband on a bikeride. You were his friend after all. Husbands are allowed to have friends too. You did seem nice and I thought maybe we could have another friend join our circle. Someone to hang out with, do dinners and movies, or play games on rainy weekends. But something deep inside of me took note that you never could really look me in the eye. You never really did address me as another person in the room. You even sat next to my husband without even blinking. While I relagated myself to the couch across the room. That was probably enough warning that something was just “different” about this friend.

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Dear Other Woman or Man,

I didn’t know much about you. I only met you once when you came to my house to take my husband on a bikeride.Image of two people on a bike ride You were his friend after all. Husbands are allowed to have friends too.  You did seem nice and I thought maybe we could have another friend join our circle. Someone to hang out with, do dinners and movies, or play games on rainy weekends. But something deep inside of me took note that you never could really look me in the eye. You never really did address me as another person in the room. You even sat next to my husband without even blinking. While I relegated myself to the couch across the room.  That was probably enough warning that something was just “different” about this friend.

Then you made the conscious decision to sleep with my husband. Well, maybe not sleep. Actually you just had sex with him. Meaningless, silly, sloppy, insecure sex. And that was ok with you right? Maybe your father did the same thing to your mother? Maybe your list of ex partners (and I am sure its quite large) did the same thing to you too? Maybe you needed to feel that you could steal someone else’s husband away to make you feel strong and good about yourself? Maybe that is what relationships are to you, just little “nothing agreements” that have no impact on your life? Maybe the only good relationship is one where they exit the door and barely know your name? Perhaps its just the feeling that you had “another one”? Conquest mode taken to the extreme?

But I need to update you. I did research and learned a lot about you. And I thought a lot about you. This is what I learned:

  1. In Sacramento you are considered the one that “everyone has had”.
  2. Most people consider you “a mess”. Someone who has no idea who you are, where you are going or when you will ever get there IF you ever do get there.
  3. You have no self-respect or personal pride. And your parents never did teach you the difference between Right and Wrong. I think you missed out on a lot of the standards of humanity.
  4. You will always be truly a lonely person. You will always settle for less because you are less than whole.
  5. Later in life, we will see you hanging out in the same bars and other establishments with false teeth, shabby hair, a mindless haze over your fading eyes, while you han over the urinal offering unsolicited blow jobs to unwary men in a rush.

Oh yeah, I also know exactly where you live, your phone number, where you go to school, your class schedule, your email address and most of the people who you hang out with.

Here is a little you need to know about me:

  1. My family is half Russian and half Irish. That equals 110% barbarian. You know the races, we were the ones who chased your measly ancestors into hiding in caves in the hills.
  2.  We believe in an eye for an eye. We shun the idea of forgive and forget, until the last drop of blood has dripped off our axe handle. Then we forget.
  3. My ancestors invented polo. Except they didn’t play with balls, they played with the heads of rival tribes. Though your head may be a bit inflated to actually play polo successfully, so we may need to use your balls if you have any.
  4. I usually don’t stop until I am done. Like a bulldog, I will bite down and hold on until the bull comes down. (And measuring the size of your rear-end I can guesstimate that would be about 15 minutes of struggle).
  5. Many of my childhood friends are not-so-nice people who like to get together on dark nights, wrapping small dolls with the names of certain people, singing around fires and then stabbing needles into that same doll. (Ironically the initials MG were printed on a doll last night). Luckily, two of them live right near you!

So just advice to heed over the next… oh say 6 years of your life…

  1. Always look over your shoulder, wherever you may be.
  2. Always check that all of your doors are locked at night.
  3. Make sure you go to the doctor routinely, especially when you start feeling slightly ill.
  4. Before getting into your truck, please check beneath your truck for different attachments.

Other than that, it was really nice meeting you and getting to know you. I wish you God’s speed.

3 times 3!

Signed

A Very Scary Calm Adam

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