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Neo-Pagan Modern Thoughts On Society

You heard about the fall of Prop 8, but what does this mean for the future or our country and society as a whole?

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Image of village peopleYou heard about the fall of Prop 8, but what does this mean for the future or our country and society as a whole?

Many supporters of Prop 8 and the ban on gay marriage see the overthrown proposition as a sign that civilization is coming to an end. The end is drawing near on the backs of gays and lesbians everywhere! Many see it as a mark that Big Gay Brother is now moving ahead with his plan to takeover the USA and then ultimately, the world!

I am here to let all of those conspiracy theorists that “YES, You are right! Gay people everywhere have been banding together for many years and developing a plot to take over the world.” We have thought out our plan in intricate detail with the sole objective of subjegation  of the straight people of the world to our will! Its the end of human kind as you know it. We like to see our plot as the forced ‘Gaynessation’ of the world. Here are some of the changes you will expect to see in the near future: (aka Operation Pink World):

1. Kmart will cease to exist.
2. Trader Joes will replace Safeway.
3. We will no longer have a president, and will now be ruled by a Queen.
4. There will be no further use of elections but instead Ru Paul will host “Drag Race” competitions to determine the next monorch of the US.
5. The Eagle, long lasting symbol of the USA will now be replaced with Hello Kitty.
6. The new beige will be pink.
7. The new green will be pink.
8. The new blue will be pink.
9. Heck, there will only be one official color: pink.
10. The new circle will become the triangle.
11. All crayons will have gay names, like Macho Man Mango Orange oir Leather Daddy Black.
12. All people will need to wear appropriate colored hankies in the back pockets to signify their sexual appetites.
13. Gyms will disappear and be replaced with bath houses.
14. Martha Stewert will have multiple talk shows, bye bye Doctor Phil!
15. Shopping will be the new accepted sport of the Olympics.
16. Baseball uniforms will get tighter, with short shorts and no shirts required.
17. Football uniforms will get tighter, with short shorts and no shirts required.
18. Elton John will become our international affairs officer.
19. Our new immigration policy will be “If you measure UP you can enter!”
20. The National Anthem will be replaced with “In the Navy”.
21. Radio stations everywhere will be forced to play hours of Madonna, Britney Spears, Lady Gaga and Barbara Streisand.
22. Republicans will be sent to Alaska to be ruled over by Sarah Palin now known as Duchess Dumb of the North, aka The Wicked Witch of the North.
23. Children will be forced to skip to school, no more school buses, and boys and girls will have to wear cute little plaid skirts through college age.
24. All badly dressed people will be forced into servitude and must watch repeated episodes of Project Runway over and over and over and over some more.
25. Real Housewives of ______ will be given sharp weapons and allowed to “cut” each other.
26. New Jersey will be sold to Mexico, if they are able to come up with $10, people included. (No Refunds either)
27. Churches will be forced to pay double taxes to make up for all the ripping off they have done up until now.
28. Closet gays will be sold to Russia and forced to mine in Siberia.
29. The entire Bush family will be sold to Osama. (No Refunds either)
30. The USA will be renamed The United Sinners of America.

And this will be just the beginning! <insert maniacal laugh here> You are DOOMED! You are all DOOMED!

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